In the real man a child is concealed: it wants to play. Up now, you women, go discover the child in the man!
Nietzsche, Thus Spoke Zarathustra
It is hard to accept an expression as ‘real man’. What does it mean an ‘unreal man’? The simplicity of a deductive logic points out that there exists a class of men, each of them being real for this reason.
Each man is taken out from the class with the risk of becoming an unqualified entity. He will show a bundle of idiosyncratic features hard to become the object of a definition or of an account of its identity. Thus, for the fact that he escapes from such an account, we may say that the man is pretty unreal while he is an individual person. It is not about the lack of reality that a dead man proves. Any pathological report knows to classify a corpse as a man or a woman.
The unreal man is one who lays open for being traveled out by a lot of events which we call parts of a life experience. He is not a real man because of being shared by events that rise above any human determination at all.
To become a real man needs to rise above the simpler and outer qualification made by a pathologist. As a second movement, there is needed that the man to turn back to his individuality shared by the life events.
How much does remain from a man after these steps in order to still be a man and even a real one?
Not so much or only some weak sketches of what is cultural qualified as manhood. As it is, at least important for Nietzsche’s philosophy, the power of a man to express his will. The sketchy appearance of a personal will does not mean a lack of will, but a will supported by sketchy forms of living. So it is a will contained by the words which express it. Or the will that judges only the particular conditions of its existence, those that put him out of himself for paying attention to the life events.
Therefore, the man who searches for its reality is primarily a being with a poor vital force. Its difference from the woman is exactly this kind of isolation in himself caused by a poor amount of life. Nietzsche’s language should be modified: the new born real man is the human being in its lack of living and in its compensatory movement to gain power by verbally deciding and by loosing itself among life events. The compensatory movement describes the theoretical perspective about life, since any theoretical approach consists in the verbal interpretation of life and in collecting outer or natural facts to be studied.
The next step in becoming a real man is to have the conscience that the isolation and the loneliness are able to be forms that encompass life. They formerly felt well as merely means of theoretical approaches, since they promised the easiness of adhering to the seriousness of a theoretical inquiry. It was left apart the unordered play of a child. Nietzsche alluded to all these by the idea that the real man conceals a child who wants to play.
The loneliness as a form able to contain life is an absurd idea. The loneliness does not give birth to anything and it is rather hostile to life while being indifferent to others’ lives.
Love between human beings is generally deemed as absurd, too. Therefore, as a natural movement from an absurd idea to an absurd relation between human beings, the loneliness succeeds of acquiring life through love. It is the love for human beings and their world, the love for a woman or for a man, but what matters is the love itself, not the objects of love.
The woman is not a woman, but in fact the human being who refuses to hang its loneliness on the theoretical means of compensating the poorness of life. It is the human being that makes itself free for being occupied by life.
The derogatory cultural image of a woman as a person in slavery or obedience to the others tells in fact about the servile aspect of human being willing to receive a life that is not proper to outer events, but adequate to itself.
From the meeting of these two aspects in the same human being, ‘the man’ becomes a real one. Those aspects are not extinguished in their individuality. Both of them subsist, for which reason the real man comes to possess life as a playful child that is discovered in himself. The loneliness of the theoretical inclination and the absolute lack of any sense of existing for itself give birth to a disordered and playful development of a vivid thought.